☕ A Monday Morning and the Chocolate Confession
The day started weirdly. I caught my colleague, Anna, munching on something strange far too early.
"Excuse me, but why are you eating white chocolate at 8 AM?" I asked, already exhausted.
She looked at me earnestly and replied, "So I don't bite my fingers." I decided to drop it. Trying to change the topic, I recalled a legendary family joke and shared it with Anna: "Do you know what your brother said when he lost his virginity?"
Anna covered her face, preempting the punchline: "Dad, please don't."
"Exactly!" I laughed, acknowledging the classic awkwardness.
🏥 Hospital Battles and the Blows of Fate
When we arrived at the clinic (we both work there), the silence was shattered by a dramatic scene in the waiting area. A woman was loudly complaining to the heavens: "Send me a loyal and hardworking man!"
One of the security guards, a big guy named Frank, leaned in and murmured in a deep, fake voice: "I already sent you one, but you friend zoned him."
We barely recovered before being called in for rounds. I heard Dr. Sterling, known for his absolute lack of bedside manner, talking to a patient: "Sorry to say this, sir, but we have diagnosed you with stage four cancer."
The patient, equally deadpan, countered: "Double it and give it to the next person."
The attending nurse was alarmed: "Hey, it doesn't work like that!"
Dr. Sterling closed the chart: "Yes, it does. Goodbye."
Right after that, we checked on old Mr. Peterson, waiting for his results. "I have your test results. Did I pass?" he asked hopefully.
The resident doctor gave a strained smile: "You will soon." We knew better than to explain what she meant.
🏃 The Truth About Health and Hurricanes
Our next patient was Bobby, struggling with his weight.
"Doctor, there's nothing I can do. The problem is that obesity runs in my family," Bobby sighed.
Dr. Sterling, predictably, was merciless: "No, Bobby, the problem is that nobody runs in your family."
Next, an elderly lady complained of a mysterious shoulder ache. "Doctor, it really hurts when I do this," she said, raising her arm at an odd angle.
The doctor simply replied: "Then don't do that. Have a nice day." His direct logic was flawless, if a little harsh.
Finally, while watching the evening news, a reporter interviewed an old woman standing amidst hurricane rubble. "Ma'am, did the hurricane destroy your home?"
The woman, completely calm, responded: "No, I just like taking my house apart on the weekends to deep clean."
I switched off the TV. It had been a day full of unexpected truths. Maybe life isn't an equation, but just a collection of absurd punchlines.
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